Using the personality frameworks in your classroom
Over the past two months, I’ve been writing and thinking a lot about the work I did to use these frameworks in my classroom and how it might be helpful to other teachers in theirs.
But I’ve also been wondering how to talk about why…
Because, like, is this all about better classroom management? More productivity? Is this really just some form of manipulation to get what we want out of the children in our classroom and the people we work with?
Well, I guess it could be.
And I think that’s why when I worked out a title for this series, I landed on “to humanize your classroom”. Because therein lies my hope. For myself. For anyone who may read this.
This isn’t a behavior management system. Frankly, those words are so creepy to me! Do we really want these kids to be managed? Do we want to manage our colleagues? Do we want to be managed by others?
In the immortal words of Alexis Rose, “Ew.”
But that’s not the work I see us doing here. Sure, this is a somewhat systematic approach. A labeling is taking place, which may make you a little itchy. My husband (who I think is a Rebel) immediately pushed back against the idea of everyone fitting into one of 4 groups (I see the irony. He didn’t.) But, he’s right, too.
Resisting reductive labels on our students is humanizing.
That said, I don’t see these frameworks as reductive. I don’t see this as simplifying labels that allow us to group and move on.
I see these frameworks as tools for developing understanding, for seeing past conflict, and for creating empathetic communication. And I think the frameworks are really helpful because that’s really hard to do that without some guidance.
Especially with a room of twenty or more fellow humans.
So I move forward with sharing these ideas and sharing how I used them with a caveat. And that is, “Or don’t.”
Don’t follow my steps. Don’t obey strictly to these frameworks. Because it doesn’t really matter how it’s done.
If you are showing up to your students as a human interacting with another human, you are already doing this work.
Ultimately I think that is what Gretchen Rubin and Dr. Robyn Jackson are teaching us here. Not how to manage and manipulate people so they do what we want more readily. But how to understand that there is always a good reason when they don’t.
A good reason that isn’t because of a personal failure on their (or our) part.
That, really, it’s caused by a disconnect.
I’m putting my strategies out here, not to make you a good, better, or best teacher. Not to increase test scores.
It just is. It’s just us remembering our humanness and how that often makes it tricky to spend all day with ourselves and other people and also get a bunch of stuff done.
So with that in mind, here are my suggested steps. You can’t do it wrong.
Steps you can take to better know yourself and your students
Use one of these frameworks on yourself. Take the Four Tendencies online quiz from Gretchen Rubin or reflect on your behaviors in terms of what motivates you to invest your time and energy in a task. Look back at posts 1 and 2 in the series to summarize the frameworks.
You may do this with some journaling or thoughtful reflection. What do you notice? What circumstances most often lead to your feelings of success or failure? What strategies do you tend to use to help reach your goals? Why do those seem to work for you?
Possible example: “I want to have a full understanding of the expectations of a task and how I can effectively achieve them. I like a clear schedule and set rules. Negotiating or changing the plan along the way causes me stress and anxiety.” These could be signs that you are Mastery Driven.
Analyze your teaching methods, work, or personal relationships through that lens. What priorities are reflected there? What conflicts or alignments? What do you tend to ignore or avoid? Who do you connect with most? Who do you conflict with?
Reframe your thinking to reflect the tendency or Will Driver of those around you with whom you are having the most conflict. This is a really good experiment to try! Look closely at one student or colleague with whom you are struggling to connect. Repeat the practice from step 1, first looking at their patterns and where they might fit in the framework. Then analyze your interactions with that person and their behaviors. How are each of your tendencies or will-drivers creating a disconnect?
Possible example: “My colleague might be an Obliger. They are looking for opportunities to check-in and collaborate on this task. They are sending me lots of correspondence and want to meet way too often. My inclination is to interpret their behavior as needy or incompetant. Can’t they just take care of it? Why do they need me to hold their hand?”
Adjust your thinking. Call upon yourself to eliminate any negative discourses about that person that may be lingering in the back of your mind. Replace those thoughts with compassionate understanding about what they may experience or perceive when they interact with you on a task.
Possible example: “As an Obliger, they want to work in community with me. They respect my input and want to create a quality product. They care a lot about the work we are doing. They care about me.”
Adjust your actions and words. Use your new perspective to build successful circumstances for your interactions with this person. What language can you use that is more likely to resonate with them? What conditions can you create that will be more meaningful to them? How can you support their understanding of your motivations as well?
Possible example: “We can create a schedule for checking-in and steps for completing our project. This way I won’t be overwhelmed or annoyed with their need for outer accountability and they will feel supported. I can also use language that affirms them and emphasizes that I value their contribution.”
Don’t demand perfection. This applies to yourself and the other person. Know that you won’t always align, but that is not because of a shortcoming in either of you. Allow for apologies and redos.
Keep trying. Believe in the possibility to connect positively with this person and don’t give up on them when things go awry.
Because there will be times when we are going to be at odds with students and coworkers whose motivations and priorities don’t match our own, it can be easy to slip into negative judgments. We know though that these judgments at best don’t serve anyone, and, at worst, promote damaging discourses, especially with our students.
We can develop a mindset based on the understanding that each of us has a genuine reason for our behaviors and that one is not more worthy than another.
We can come to understand ourselves and our students.
When we create a space that attempts to connect to each individual, I believe we are honoring the humanity of each person in the room.
No comments:
Post a Comment